Not much to say. I'm just having some trouble focusing on anything but Africa right now. I've been trying to keep myself busy so I wouldn't think about it but to tell you truth I'm losing focus and motivation on those things! Yes, the century ride is only nearing closer and I am not motivated right now to get on my bike! Yes, I am super scared of what that means on event day, and even if I had been training like I should, I'm scared anyway. I think the realization of what 100 miles is, and especially with the dreaded HILLS, is setting in and I am scared. I have my moments where I am like, "I know I can do this! I've done a marathon, a couple half marathons, and many more things I didn't think I could do, so YES YOU CAN DO THIS!" And then I have a couple moments where I think, "But this is SOOO different! This is harder! This is scarier!" Those voices battle it out on an hourly basis. I think the problem is simply that I have been out of practice for a few weeks so I am out of the right mindset and scared of how far behind the rest of the team I am. Which on the one hand, I am no stranger to (since I'm pretty much a walker, slow jogger at best, and my teams have been runners!), and I know that especially with TNT I shouldn't worry about that because it's individual, they're super supportive, etc etc etc. And then there's the other hand...and it just sucks to be behind people and have them waiting on you, even if it's by choice because they want to see you succeed. That is such a blessing and a curse sometimes. You love hearing the encouragement and the comfort in knowing that they are there, and at the same time sometimes you wish nobody was there and you could just stroll in whenever you dang well please. Bottom line, I need to get my ass in gear. One other tiny confession...I'm afraid of going up the hills yes, that is no secret, but I might be more afraid of coming DOWN the hills! I'm a chicken and the thought of being out of control flying down a hill scares the shit out of me. I don't think I could hold in the brakes hard enough coming downhill. So there you have it. I'm afraid of going downhill and feeling out of control, panicking, and then wrecking...and even if all of that doesn't happen, the anxiety of flying down a hill with little control is bad enough.
So...back to Africa. I can't stop thinking about it. April is almost here and then May, and then I leave! Right now my focus is on the flights. I arranged my seats better, ordered things for the computer to use in-flight, am thinking about the books, magazines, games, etc to buy before I go. Researching ways to pass the time, things to consider, and how to conquer jet lag. Apparently there is a pill called "No Jet Lag" (clever name eh?) which will do just that. Some people think it's all in your head, some people swear by it. I don't know. I have looked at my flight times and what time it will be in Cape Town on what flights so I can try and use my flights to start getting adjusted to the local time... putting too much thought into this? Maybe. I land in the evening and I'm guessing I will be ready to just collapse into a bed after 28 hours of in/out sleep on airplanes, and considering that I'm ready to die after a 3 hour flight...but a little research never killed anyone right? So, if I were to really try and get on local time before I get there I figure I need to try and sleep on my first two flights from Phoenix to Atlanta to Dakar. These would be nighttime in Cape Town. And then on flights Dakar to Johannesburg and Johannesburg to Cape Town I need to try and stay awake, so when I land in Cape Town about 8 p.m. local time, I can just get settled into bed, and wake up on local time. Done. It sounds too easy...! Haha I'm sure I'll want to sleep at totally random times just to pass the time and because there is a 12 hour time difference between Phoenix and Cape Town. In any event, I'm banking on being exhausted by the time I get there so that I just slip into the time zone without my body noticing the difference. Man I'm excited.
I asked a coworker who flew to Japan over Christmas Break if she had any recommendations to passing the time and dealing with jet lag, she had an 11 hour flight. She said that surprisingly, the time goes really fast. Which I can kinda see that point of view. I'm totally building it up right now as this like heinous horrible amount of time, so I can bet that it could end up seeming not that bad. Plus, an 8 hour flight (which I have 2 in a row of) is about 4 movies. Not too bad... :)
Did I mention I'm excited?
